“You can either leave something for people, or, You can leave something in people.”
ANNE LAMONT
I am 78 now and, fortunately, will see most of my Grandkids next week. I am aware but not worried that I have more life behind me than in front of me, but I am concerned with what I leave with my Grandchildren. At this time in life, I am blessed with the power of being perceived as older and wiser, and, without preaching, I have been trying to leave as much of those lived experiences with my Grandkids as possible. A Cherokee Blessing is uttered at each child’s birth; “May you live long enough to know why you were born.” Of course, I am still working on that, but there are several things I do now that are noticed by those beautifully perceptive minds that let them know how much they each and all matter, not just to me but in the larger context of humanity.
I have realized that the impact of what I “Leave” with my Grands is directly related to the effort and focus I bring to the activity. I do several things in our family that screams being interested and in tune with what goes on in their lives. I am not saying I understand, but I do pay attention. The most important thing I do is to ask their parents what is essential in their lives and how they interact with their family unit, and then I do all I can to reinforce that. This is doubly true with tweens and teenage Grandkids. Then I take this info and try to catch them doing something right or empathize when things aren’t going their way. Say what you will, but when they know that they are being thought of and talked about in the family, it fosters feelings of being critical, and that, my friends, is a home run.
My one 16-year-old granddaughter has moved on from Facebook, where I used to message her occasionally, so I asked her one day what the best way I can send you some Love in the middle of the week without embarrassing you in front of her friends is. She smiled and said to send her a text. I will tell you that, except for class time at school, I get a quick Thank You back when I occasionally send her a message out of the blue. Once again, a home run.
Now, these things work for me, but I encourage you to find some meaningful ways to offer each of your Grandchildren individual attention. I consider it a privilege to be a part of their lives, and I intend to leave “IN” them a sense that they matter to me and the world they inhabit. Grand Slam home run!
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