1. Do everything you can to keep any hard feeling between you and the children’s custodial parent from the children themselves. Bite your tongue, if necessary, to keep those feelings in check and known only to you. It will not help your case if the children are aware of these conflicts.
2. Respect temporary situations. If separation is temporary, like when a child adjusts to a new stepparent or a new school, be understanding. Changes, including new families, take time and energy. If the custodial parent feels that contact can resume as soon as life is on a firm footing again, respect this. Your time will come and it will come quicker because of your understanding of temporary situations.
3. Step in immediately if you see evidence of or even suspect that the children are being physically or emotionally abused. You can do this by contacting the agency or department of social services that protects minor children in the state where your grandchildren live.
4. Persevere. No child can have too much love. Children have a moral, if not legal, right to the love of grandparents. You can protect those rights for your grandchildren.
5. Research the issue thoroughly by going to The Custody Center and taking advantage of the resources they offer.
Only after you have taken all of these steps should you entertain the possibility of consulting a lawyer. The Custody Center information can point you in that direction if necessary.
NEIL
