Do you sometimes find yourself with your Pre-teen or teen Grandkids, and the conversation isn’t flowing as it used to? I used to get a call each Sunday morning from my three wonderful Grandchildren when they were on their 25-minute ride to church. At that time, they were like 10 to 15. I say used to because two of them now drive, and they are not allowed to use their phones while driving, a practice which I endorse since they are new to the whole driving experience. However, I digress. When they called with the three of them in the car, the conversation went something like this. 15-year-old, I understand that you and your best friend went to a conference on music; how did that go.? Oh, I didn’t know you met the boys; I thought you went to learn more about music. Laughter! The 14-year-old; Your Mom tells me you have been volunteering with a Horse rescue program. What interesting stuff are you learning about horses? Long conversation. 10-year-old; silence! How are things going at your new school? OK, silence. Are you making new friends? Not really, silence? Are the teachers nice? I guess, silence. Have you joined any teams or groups? No………. silence.
You get my drift.
Guess what?
It is time for me to up my game in conversation with the youngest. I dig in and learn all I can about what 10-year-old boys like to talk about. Fast forward to last month, and my now 14-year-old grandson rode back some 4 hours with me from his sister’s graduation. When we get out of the car, he offers, unsolicited, Grandpa Neil, I like riding with you; we get to talk. When I ride with my parents, that doesn’t happen so much. Besides four years, what changed? Me!
I have become interested in the world of pre-teens and teens. I bought and read a book called “The Metaverse.”
Not my thing but his. I then sent him a copy, and we discussed it all the time. I didn’t say it was easy, but it is really rewarding.
Each child is very different and ever-changing, but I refuse to stand by and let these opportunities for enhanced meaningful connection pass us by. Being a Good Grandparent is being in a state of Grace. It is a blessing, and I intend to make the most of it.
Thank You for being a Caring Grandparent.
One of the tenets of my Dale Carnegie training is that we should speak in…